FuNkYlIcIoS

While enjoying a Big Mac with fries and a drink at your patio set you are suddenly interrupted by two individuals who walk into your back yard uninvited. Both were black tuxedos with their ties neatly set. One of the men was bald, wearing sun shades and eccentric piercing on his ears. The other had goggles around his forehead with his hair color bright red and a mix of orange; while of it was pony tailed in the back. You stop eating your burger and get up. “Oh I’m sorry did we break your concentration? Sit down and finish chewing it’s rude to speak with your mouth full in front of guests” said the bald man. You do as he says and swallow. “That’s a nice burger you got there, smells pretty good from over here” says the bald man as he approaches you. “Mind if I have a bite?” says the bald man; he grabs your burger without you even acknowledging him to do so. “Mmmm damn Reno this is a nice tasty burger, Rufus is a vegetarian so me and Reno here don’t get out much too eating burgers. Can I have a drink to wash this down?” says the bald man as he swipes your drink without your permission. “What do you guys want?” you ask a little intimidated by their presence. “I believe the polite way of asking is ‘How may I help you two gentlemen?’” said the bald man. “Excuse me” you reply to his smart-alecky remark. “Did I stutter?” replied the bald man “What?” you reply “WHAT COUNTRY ARE YOU FROM?” yelled the bald man “Uh oh Rude is about to get real rude all over your ass” said Reno with a half-smile “Wh-What?” you say in fear “WHAT AIN’T NO COUNTRY I EVER HEARD OF, DO THEY SPEAK ENGLISH IN WHAT?” yelled Rude as he reached into his pocket of his tux and pulled out a glossy silver dessert eagle with a cork attached to some string at the end of the barrel. He point the gun at you and begin to sweat bullets “Wh..Wh..What?” you say while you stutter in fear. “SAY ‘WHAT’ ONE MORE GOD DAMN TIME IN FACT I DOUBLE DARE YOU!” says Rude as he cocks his gun. “YOU EVER READ THE BIBLE?” asks Rude. “N..not much of it” you reply still instilled in fear. “REMEMBER THIS VERSE, EZEKIEL 25:17."THE PATH OF THE RIGHTEOUS MAN IS BESET ON ALL SIDES BY THE INEQUITIES OF THE SELFISH AND THE TYRANNY OF EVIL MEN. BLESSED IS HE WHO, IN THE NAME OF CHARITY AND GOOD WILL, SHEPHERDS THE WEAK THROUGH THE VALLEY OF THE DARKNESS, FOR HE IS TRULY HIS BROTHER'S KEEPER AND THE FINDER OF LOST CHILDREN. AND I WILL STRIKE DOWN UPON THEE WITH GREAT VENGEANCE AND FURIOUS ANGER THOSE WHO ATTEMPT TO POISON AND DESTROY MY BROTHERS. AND YOU WILL KNOW I AM THE LORD WHEN I LAY MY VENGEANCE UPON YOU!" yelled Rufus as he pulled the trigger on his gun and a cork popped out with a stick and a flag that read ‘Thanks for the fav at Mobis-New-Nest’. Rude and Reno begin to laugh at you as they both exit your back yard leaving you shaken and traumatized at what just happened.